Wellness over willpower: ditching resolutions and choosing balance this January

By mid-January, many of us are already quietly renegotiating the promises we made to ourselves just two weeks earlier. The gym schedule is feeling overly ambitious, the food plan has you feeling hangry, and the budget spreadsheet created to pay off Christmas debt in record time is closed, hoping the computer won’t save it. If this sounds familiar, you are not alone. And more importantly, you are not failing.

The new year has a way of convincing us that growth must start with a complete remodel of ourselves. New Year = New You, complete with a new body, new habits, new personality or a whole new life. And when these drastic changes don’t stick, because this new life can’t survive in real life, disappointment follows. That disappointment is often paired with self-blame, and we assume the problem is a lack of determination or willpower.

But what if the problem isn’t us?

What if the problem is goals and expectations that require us to abandon who we are? What if our growth can stem from what we have already planted and nurtured?

This January, I invite a different approach of choosing wellness over willpower and alignment over pressure. Instead of becoming someone new, try taking better care of the whole person we already are, one small step at a time.

New Year’s resolutions tend to look remarkably similar, with marketing aimed at the newest diet, exercising fads, and keeping your finances in better order than a credit union in a small town. Those goals aren’t inherently bad, but they are often narrowly framed, focused on control and criticism, rather than growth and self-love.

Resolutions kick off just after that in-between holiday time, when our lives have been about relaxing, eating dainties and cheese platters, not knowing what day of the week it is. Unsurprisingly, this becomes the busiest time for health and fitness programs. New downloads spike, food tracking apps see a sudden increase in return users and subscriptions to promises of becoming “better people” are added to an already maxed-out credit card. A significant portion of downloads are abandoned on the first day and use continues to decline for the next two weeks. The second Friday in January has even been labelled “Quitter’s Day,” and while that’s catchy, it doesn’t do much for anyone’s self-esteem. 

What this proves is that resolution “failure” is not a personal flaw. It has become a predictable outcome of unrealistic expectations layered onto already busy lives.

When resolutions don’t last, the emotional impact can be serious. Negative self-talk, lowered self-esteem and the belief that “I can’t follow through” take hold. Over time, this can make future goal-setting feel discouraging or even pointless.

These unrealistic seasonal promises create a pass-or-fail mindset, leaving little energy for learning, adjusting, or even acknowledging effort. This can be especially draining for post-secondary students who are already navigating the academic “pass or fail” system. Adding resolution failure to post-holiday exhaustion, return to academic routines and winter fatigue, turns January into a season of survival, rather than renewal.

When we set intentions for growth, believing we need to change who we are to be better, our attention shifts to discipline and self-correction. If those changes don’t hold, we assume we’ve failed.

Approaching January with awareness of balance and wellness for our whole self creates opportunities to focus on our energy, our supports, and our values, and to explore what sustainable personal growth might look like in this season. Balance and wellness supports the whole person; increasing health physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

Choosing wellness over willpower shifts our energy towards honesty, support, and lifelong acts that align with our purpose. Willpower insists we push harder; wellness asks us to listen closely to our needs. Wellness allows us to become healthier and stronger as opposed to trying to be perfect. In the great syllabus of life, perfection is not an intended outcome.

Working within an Indigenous organization alongside Elders, influential coworkers, friends and strong Anishinabek values, I have learned the idea of living well through balance. The Anishinaabe concept of mino-bimaadiziwin, living the good life, offers an important lens: wellness isn’t a checklist or a destination. It’s an ongoing practice of alignment and balance for the whole self.

I’ve learned that seasons matter. Winter is not a time for constant motivation or failure; it is a season that naturally invites rest, reflection, and care. January can be less about force and more about truth, respect, and love.

Choosing alignment over resolutions can be surprisingly simple:

• Putting energy into caring for ourselves rather than correcting.
• Acknowledging all successes, even simply showing up.
• Taking time to reconnect with our values and understand who we are in this season, as students, staff, leaders, family, community members. Or any other role important to you.
• Spending time with family, mentors, Elders to reflect and learn.
• Connecting with nature, even in the cold, through brisk walks outside, or tending to plants indoors.
• Practicing gentleness and self-respect while evaluating goals that honour both where we’ve been and where we’re going

Wellness, or holistic self-care, isn’t about spreadsheets or app notifications. Wellness prioritizes balancing all of our needs for a good life. A mino-bimadiziiwin-anchored wellness comes from within, and radiates outwards. It is about our well-being and our impact, not about matching standards set by social media or Western popularity and productivity. Self-love, going easy on ourselves, and balance means neither indulgence or avoidance. Holistic wellness is nourishment for the mind, body, heart and spirit.

One teaching that resonates with me, an interpretation of Debwewin (truth), that we only know what WE know and our truths are ours. Our own truths are not meant to be measured against what others are doing. Living honestly and authentically through intentional acts and decisions supports meaningful successes that reflect our values and goals.  And as we honour our truths, so should we honour others.

This January, instead of resolutions, choose wellness. One small act of whole self-care. One moment of alignment. One recognition of what is true for you. Let growth be quiet. Let it be kind. Let it support the whole person you ALREADY are, and let the journey continue.

Remember, it is in the space between trying and succeeding that we learn how brave we are. Be kind to yourself there.

I express my gratitude, appreciation and love for all your beautiful truths.

Annie Ashdown, Wellness Coordinator

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Wellness is not meant to be a solo project, it’s a group assignment, and self respect and care are asking for help. SGEI has supports available for students and staff to reflect on their values, navigate challenges, and find balance. SGEI has support for living your good life, in every season.

Contact a Wellness Coordinator for help with any of the supports listed below, and for other supports that may not be listed.

Academic supports:

• Tutors arranged through coordinators
• Research resources: ProQuest, ebooks, and research companion. Students can also access our library portal. If you need assistance, contact our librarian, Tanya Howarth.
• Computer labs and technology support
• Student study spaces
• Individualized accommodations provided by our Accessibility Team for students and staff

Mental Health and Wellness supports:

• Wellness Coordinators at each campus to connect you with services and supports at the campus and in the community
• Mental Health Therapist provides counselling for SGEI students
• Financial aid and OSAP assistance

Physical supports:

• Fitness centre with top technology and training available by appointment
• Supper pantry
• Wellness stations and kits for personal needs
• Free meals for students, hot breakfast and lunch served

Spiritual supports:

• Cultural mentorship
• Elder in Residence
• Indigenous history, literature, cultural knowledge, events and celebrations
• Saagajiwe, SGEI’s Grandfather drum
• Gookommisinaan, Grandmother Eagle Staff

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Check out this online resource, recommended by SGEI’s Mental Health Counsellor:

Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff

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